Hi friends!! I know it’s been a few weeks since I’ve sent out a blog. And I know that in order to be successful on a blog, you have to be consistent. ARG!! So what’s been going on?? I’ve been blocked. I know that this blog is to share my art journey and wonderful art tips and tricks. But the message that has been coming has been one that doesn’t fit that mold. I’ve been running from it, not wanting to share in fear that no one would want to read it. But after these weeks have passed with no new message to share, I’ve decided to give into what is gnawing inside and share.

Life is hard friends!! And I’m sure I’m preaching to the choir with the state of the world right now. But for some reason, I have been struggling on a deep level that I couldn’t identify. It’s been almost 3 years since my life blew up and I went through a divorce, moved to a new city, and started my life again. Oh, and did I mention that there was a pandemic in there. My family had always been my most treasured thing, and so I had to fight hard to come back from that kind of a blow. I needed to focus on who I was and how I wanted my new life to look and feel. Just weeks before my divorce was to be final, I met the most amazing man who showed me love like I had never known before. The lights started to come back on in my life and I started to live again. This week, we will be celebrating our 1 year wedding anniversary, and I can’t believe the life that I get to live with this handsome man. So what is the problem, you ask??

One of the things that I’ve learned is that some parts of life can be so amazing, while other parts can be so very sad. It’s confusing!! And so these last few weeks have been very confusing to me. Why the funk when I am so happy and have had so many exciting new things happen in my art career. And last week, it finally hit me. I realized that for the last couple weeks, I’ve been celebrating with friends and family all of their graduations, kids coming home from college, family trips, etc. I realized that while I’ve been going through the grief that goes along with divorce, I’ve become an empty nester. I’m finally in a new normal place in life after 3 years and I can finally feel normal feelings again. And the funk that I’ve been feeling is the normal momma grief of her babies flying from the nest. I always looked so forward to the summer and my time with my kids. The laughter and banter that filled the house is something I will always cherish. And I’m so glad that I got to experience every moment. But life is quiet in my house right now. No one needs to go to an appointment or a practice. No one is rummaging through my refrigerator. No late night deep conversations about life, love, and video games. My daily job of being a mom is complete, but the sadness of that is here.

So, I am going to work yet again on healing this momma’s heart from the loss. I’m going to celebrate every amazing opportunity that comes my boys ways as they move into this next phase of adulthood. I’m going to look forward to the time that I do get to spend with them. I’m going to celebrate my wonderful life with my husband and the amazing family that has come along with him. I’m going to celebrate the new daughter that has come into my world with David and enjoy fun new adventures with her as well. And I’m going to be gentle with myself as I process through this new normal.

And if any of you have any great advice on how to walk into this next phase in life gracefully, I’d love to hear it!!

Thank you so much for listening!!